When coaching isn’t working, it may be time to stop talking about the work and start talking to the person.
In this solo episode, Jay explores what to do when you’ve coached, given feedback, shown empathy, and nothing seems to work. Drawing from a memorable leadership exercise at Tesla, he shares how leaders can move beyond surface-level conversations and create a “moment of truth” with a difficult employee.
Jay also breaks down his EPIC framework, Example, Pause, Impact, and Change or Continue, to help leaders balance empathy with accountability. From slowing down and choosing the right tone to knowing when it may be time to involve HR, this episode offers a practical approach for navigating difficult conversations while still giving people every opportunity to succeed.
Notable Quotes
“What you have to do in that moment is to have that moment of truth.” — Jay Abbasi
“I believe we should always be empathetic.” — Jay Abbasi
“It’s okay to acknowledge how they feel and shift the conversation over to the performance and what you’re expecting.” — Jay Abbasi
“If they’re not excelling, if they’re not happy or they’re not able to do the job well, there’s a better job out there for them.” — Jay Abbasi
Resources and Links
Jay Abbasi
Website: https://jayabbasi.me/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayabbasi/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jayabbasi_/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thejayabbasi/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@jayabbasipodcast
Join Us Next Time
On Monday’s episode, you’ll meet Michelle, a VP of HR at a national home services company who feels drained by the relentless pace of new technology and AI. Jay is joined by Naomi Titleman, former CHRO of American Express Canada, ex-Deloitte consultant, and founder of future foHRward, to explore how leaders can stop reacting to constant change and start shaping the future of work before it gets shaped for them.